I tried giving WordPress another chance. We just can’t work things out… Blogger isn’t the best thing ever, but at least he loves me back.

http://chilinrice.blogspot.com/

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Try to Relax Occasionally

The fact that I’m spending my summer days lying on my ass all day long is doing wonders for my back; however, some may think that not having a real life would leave me with not much to talk about on my blog… Well, I’m about to prove those non-believers wrong.

I finished filling out every single application form requested by the universities, along with my certificate of approved subjects, curriculum and a copy of my passport; all sealed up, waiting for those lovely people at UPS to send it to Spain. So…I’m being a productive lazy ass.

I just fell in love with Harry Potter books and movies all over again. Therefore, my sexual fantasies with Ron Weasley are back… My imaginary sex life is so great.

A few days ago I found the best blog in the freaking world: Confessions of a College Callgirl (you can find the link on the  right side, wordpress being a baby). I read the whole thing in two days; if you haven’t, I highly recommend it… A girl talking about how big her breasts are and blowjobs… I mean, what else could you really ask for?

You know what else is just awesome? Sims… So awesome, indeed, that last year I made two music videos using Sims3, and I just remember about them. Even though, now, I would change it completely (leave the song, erase everything else!) they’re still my babies, and since they aren’t major screw-ups, I have to be proud of them.

(I don’t know why, but this stupid thing isn’t letting me upload the videos; not even post the links… If you actually give a rat’s ass about these❤ you can find them in the comment section : D. I’m sorry WordPress hates me so much, but I can’t help it if I’m popular).

I’m ending this worthless entry the most logical way possible; stating that I just had a really amusing chat with a machine: (And yes, I did write “you’re are”, because I’m just that bright).

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Optional Essay Question

I’m not embarrassed to admit that watching a bunch of overpaid actors in “Valentine’s Day” got me in the mood. It may not be a porno or even an erotic movie, but it had me thinking how much I would like to have a hardcore make out session with Anne Hathaway *ahem* I meant Ashton Kutcher, of course… And, since I don’t have any kind of companionship lately and my vibrator just run out of batteries I have to focus that energy into something else. So, I’m switching to a nostalgic mood, just like that.

I’ve wanted to write about my college years here, for a while now. Somehow I couldn’t come up with something other than: Look how well I pull off the construction look!!

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Now, I realize I shouldn’t focus on college itself, since it wasn’t the homework, projects or classes that made these years so amazing… It was the people (Big “aww!” please!)

I shouldn’t even bother writing a corny entry, since it isn’t a corny generation. I don’t know if it’s the time and age, but I would define my classmates as… Attention whores, each one in their own way.

(While I try to describe each kind, keep in mind I don’t have any plans to pursue the comedic path, I’m aware of my limitations)

Hippie Girl. If it was up to her, the whole career would be about explaining how she designed the building based on peaceful thoughts.

Inappropriate Guy. “Penis! Are you, people, listening to me? I said penis! Vagina! Now I said Vagina! Penis in Vagina! Sex! Sex! TWO GIRLS ONE CUP!”

AlwaysRight Girl. And if she isn’t, she’ll throw a fit so the universe change its course and she’ll be right again.

TooGoodForYouFuckers Guy. He likes to think of himself as an already graduated student who’s doing the rest of us a favor by showing up to classes. I see very kinky sex between him and AlwaysRight Girl.

IWillJustThrowRandomComments Girl. “Have I told you I’m going to marry a Colombian? I would but I hate being so fat! I’m a virgin, if you were wondering; and I’d kill for sushi right now… Aren’t you worried about skin cancer?”.

Alternative Guy. I know this is a phase most teenagers go through… But he’s already 20, you’d think he’d be done with telling people how cool he is for liking Alice in Wonderland before it became mainstream.

TooGayToFunction Guy. If I said that I’d love him even more if he stopped complaining about how his Burberry wallet and Prada cell phone were so last season I’d be lying.

Perfect Guy. He’s hot and a gentleman, every girl in my class has a crush on him. I would too if I didn’t have the feeling he has a thing with the TooGaytoFunction Guy.

CompletePackage Girl. The female version of the guy above. Pretty, nice, smart, big boobs… What keeps her from being the Perfect Girl? Unlike her male version, she’s into the opposite sex.

HardWorker Guy. I have nothing but respect for a guy who is majoring in two things.

YoYoMothaFocka Guy. Oh man, this whitey sure loves acting like a nigga.

I’m missing a bunch others (who are equally fascinating… I’m just lazy), including me.  I’m an attention whore, just like the others, I just don’t know which kind. I’m rooting for the:

LooksGreatWhenShePretendsToBeAConstructionWorker Girl.

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(And if you turn your head a bit to the right you may get to meet the TooGoodForYouFuckers Guy).

I said it before, I can’t come up with something corny to say about these people. I will, however, say this: Just the way they are, each and every single one of them is fucking awesome. I just hope I have attention-whored myself enough so they’ll miss me as much as I’ll miss them.

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You’re Coming Pretty Close to Doing it

Little update… No, no, it’s actually a big one.

I just bought my ticket to Spain!

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I’m leaving on July, 30. I’ll stop at Mexico City, waiting just 3 hours for the next flight (after having been on an airport for 10 hours, 3 hours is my definition of awesome), blah, blah, blah, I’ll arrive in Madrid the very next morning. The End.

Hopefully I’ll be too busy being scared out of my mind, that I won’t notice it’s such a long boring trip.

Oh, I almost forgot to say something… YAY!

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Keeps Me from Getting Bored

I don’t know if I should say I have updates or just random thoughts… And now, I don’t know if there’s actually a difference between the two. Screw this, it’s 1am: I have something to say.

. I have the house all to myself this week! In 20 years of life I’ve never been home alone before. I guess it’s way to prepare myself for life in Spain… And to PARTYYYYYYYYY!!!

(Naaah… I’m too big of a nerd to do something like that).

. Spain plans are going smooth. Well, at least the papers I need. I already have my curriculum with all the classes I have taken, all signed and everything. That excites me, ok!?

. The other day I went to see my gynecologist for a regular check up (long live the internet who lets me share these kind of things with strangers) and guess who I saw… My 6th grade crush; who, a couple of weeks ago, I found out impregnated a girl. Oh dear boy o’ mine, don’t you know this would have never happened with me? I’m a pro at putting on condoms (I could almost hear my mom saying “that’s my girl!”).

.  My beautiful blog just reached 20,000 views. Big fucking yay! It’s a big deal to me… So all jokes a side (I can do that), thanks a freaking zillion to every single person who has ever read me, and special thanks to the people who took some time of their life to write a comment.

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Filed under Girly Talk, Plain Stupid, Plans

Make it Very Dry, and No Olive

Somehow, I lack the creativity to write this entry… I’ll just say this like it is, and you can add some funny accent, yes?

Saturday night was so fucked up, dude!

Regularly, I don’t write about my social life. I tell myself it doesn’t add anything to the main objective of this blog, but the real reason is … I just don’t have any.

Even though I’m Miss Party-Girl to you, now; I’m still true to my principles. This does has something to do with the point of my blog. The party was, amongst other things (like, birthday party, end-of-the-semester party, let’s-get-really-drunk party), my going away party.

I really don’t know what to say about it, though. A lot of shit happened, funny, exciting, weird… But I’m guessing it’s the kind of things you have to be there, or at least know the people.

Ok, ok. I do have a couple of statements:

. I❤ Jelly Shots (and I feel I shouldn’t be this proud of saying it just like that).

. Real fun doesn’t start until you’re thrown in to a pool against your will… And I’m not even being sarcastic.

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The truth is… I will miss these people like crazy.

The second truth is that I should receive a medal (or a set of applauses, at least) for having the balls to upload pictures of myself not only when I’m sleep-deprived, also when I’m wet and drunk (…dirty!).

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Adding to the weirdness of the night and without getting into gruesome details, I have to say I learned something important: You don’t need Europe to try those things you see on French movies.

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She’s Only a Little Child

Remember what I told you, honey bees, about my super-duper new camera?

If you don’t, you can read it here… or I could simply spoil it for you: It’s waterproof (yay!).

Well, a couple of days ago my baby lost its water-virginity. I was hanging out with a group of friends, and one of them said “you should have done this from the start” and sank the poor thing into a glass of water. It was almost pornographic.

This is the result:

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If it wasn’t such a blurry picture you could’ve seen my eyes in terror at the image of my camera being raped.

Somehow I managed to make this entry about my waterproof camera sound dirty. I have a talent for these kind of things.

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